“I can remember almost wanting to dislike the original before I’d even seen it due to an almost ‘Twilight’ backlash that was circulating”

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2 Review
By Simon Jago

So the Twilight phenomenon finally comes to an end. Thousands of teenage girls worldwide will be sobbing into their Robert Pattinson shaped pillows as all their favourite sparkly vampires and Red Indian wolf boys come together to say farewell to the franchise. Whether your Team Edward,  Team Jacob or frankly don’t give a flying bat turd you really can’t help avoid the hysteria that the Twilight movies cause. They are what they are… and at that they are very good at doing what they do!

PLOT SYNOPSIS
Following on from the previous movie, Bella (Kristen Stewart) has survived giving birth to her unholy Dracula baby only through being vigorously snacked upon by her undead lover Edward (Robert Pattinson). Bella must learn to control her new vampiric lust for blood as she might end up slaughtering all her friends and family who are completely unaware of the events that have unfolded. Jacob (Taylor Lautner), a werewolf has imprinted on baby Renesmee, a process similar to choosing a life partner and is now aggressively protective over the child. The whole gang are one big happy family until Renesmee’s existence is discovered by another vampire Irina (Maggie Grace) who immediately travels to Italy to inform the Volturi, the most powerful coven of vampires who are the equivalent of royalty in the vampire world. Mistaking Renesmee for a bitten child or an ‘Immortal Child’, The Volturi set out to bring an end to the Cullen’s coven.

SIMON’S SATISFIED
I have followed the ‘Twilight Saga’ since the first film and I can remember almost wanting to dislike the original before I’d even seen it due to an almost ‘Twilight’ backlash that was circulating. However, once I saw ‘Twilight’ I realised that it’s a film aimed completely at teenage girls so if you’re not a pubescent female crying over your latest zit or waiting for Chad to invite you to the prom, then either deal with the movies existence or don’t watch it. In my opinion the film worked and was actually enjoyable. Since then I have seen all of the Twilight movies and apart from ‘A New Moon’, which I found purely a fan girls installment and mind-numbingly dull for the rest of us, I have actually enjoyed them all.

The film is far from perfect and feels at times like they were on commission to use computer generated imagery, which by the way in places look like it was fished out of the manure pile at George Lucas’s Skywalker Ranch. Example number 1 being the horrible CGI’d baby face that Renesmee has for most of the film. Why does the baby have a CGI face? I can only assume they wanted the baby to look similar throughout it’s growth but surely they could have just used clever casting? Bella’s first outing into the wilderness to hunt with Jacob goes horrible wrong in the digital department. The graphics are so bad that even the low res polygons of Lara Croft running through the jungle in Tomb Raider 2 would strike me as more realistic. Also concerning the film’s finale, since when are there searing hot volcanic fissures coursing their way underneath the snow planes of Forks, Washington?

RATING
Not the greatest Twilight film but a very nice way to tie up the story and say farewell to all the characters. If you go with your girlfriend, make sure you have the tissues at the ready.

Maniac Rating - 3 Stars